So I really really really love October, and Halloween is my favorite holiday! I just love the colors, and pumpkins, and decorations!! I think I started decorating a week before it was even october, and I'm not sick of it yet!! Casey's mom, Sandy and I have been making those really cute outdoor ladder crafts, (more like she makes them, I paint!) but they have been super fun to put in front of my condo by my door, becuase there is only so much I can put out there.
Work for me has been good, but occasionally stressful, I am working with a student who has been there for a while, but this is my first year being his personal aide, and just imagine being with a 17 year old 4 year old. Mentally he is totally 4 years old, and just imagine question after question, even the same question 4 times in a row, all day long..... Some days are very, very long. He is a great kid though, and can be super funny at times, just mentally exhausting! I just tell myself that he is teaching me patience, and by the time I have kids, maybe I will be more patient and mature. And I also have to remind myself that he didn't choose to be that way, and hardly notices how much he talks of how exhausting he is, but I think it is good for me!
Casey's job is going good, but he is also stressed. I've just got him to start going to Yoga classes with me, becuase we are both so stressed by the time we get home, we just need something to calm us down, and release the stress the builds up in our bodies. Our first class together was yesterday, and we both really enjoyed it, but we are both pretty sore! But a good sore!
To add to our stress, my wonderful Grandma Sharon about 2 or 3 weeks ago had her 2nd stint placed in her heart, to hopefully get her feeling better and on track. Well a few days after that, she started having chest pain, so her and my mom went into the E.R. and had some tests done. Everything was negative,(which is good) so they wanted to transfer her to Mckay Dee Hospital in Ogden just to keep an eye on her and do some more tests, becuase nothing was seriously wrong... yet. On her way down to the hospital in the ambulance that was transfering her, her anxiety began to go up, which then made her lungs start to fill up, so then she couldn't breath. The E.M.T.s job is to get that person there alive, so they had to put a ventillator down her throat to breath for her. When she got to the E.R. things were not looking good. The Doctors told my mom and her siblings to gather our family, probably to come say our goodbyes. At about midnight on saturday, I got a text from my dad saying "you should come down, things are not looking good, come say your goodbye". Immediatly I started to cry. Every other time my Grandma has gone to the hospital, (which has been alot!) I have been so sure that she would pull out of it, and make it, there was never a doubt that she wouldn't make it, but this time I just felt my heart sink, and I was sick to my stomache. I wasn't ready for her to go. Kylee was sleeping over at my house that night, so her Casey and I headed down to the hospital and got there around 1. When we got there we joined my family in the ICU waiting room. I wasn't sure what to think when I went in and saw her. All I know is I never want to see her like that again. She was sedated, but I made sure to tell her that I loved her, but it was too hard to say goodbye, so I didn't. I was glad to be there for my mom, because she was having a really hard time. We then found out, that she could possibly pull out of it and maybe be ok. They wanted to wait a few days till they took out the ventillator, so that they could stablize her. We went home at about 2:30 a.m. feeling a little better that she may pull out and be ok. A few days later they took about the ventillator that was breathing for her, and almost immediatly her lungs began to fill again, and she couldn't breath, so they put it right back in, and sedated her. This was not a good sign. My sisters and I went down to visit her when they were going to try and take out the ventillator again, and we were able to go into her room while she was awake, but she wasn't able to talk. Amanda and I went in and she opened her eyes, and I wouldn't have cried if Amanda hadn't started to! But poor grandma with her eyes told us not to cry, and that she needed her nails done! Leave it to her to try and be humorous at a time like this! She made it clear that she didn't want the tube put back in, should her lungs fill again. She was ready to go, and we were not at all ready to let her! So we went down thinking that would be the last time we saw our grandma alive, since it hadn't worked the first time they pulled it out. When they pulled it out, Thank the Lord, she could breath! She was alive and staying here!! She later told us that nobody wanted her! WE want her, that's why she's still here! Even if she did want to go, she's staying, and I couldn't be happier! It was just such a terrible experiance, and I have never lost someone close to me, so it really opened my eyes to what people go through when they lose someone they love, and I know one day will come when she does go, but she's here for a reason, and it makes me want to spend more time with her, becuase we almost lost her. She is doing well so far, they transfered her to Sunshine Terrice Rehab, so she isn't living there, just getting stable and stronger. Glad your still here Grammy! I love you!!
